I’ve Run Out of Eggs
I’ve run out of eggs what am I to do
It’s not like I can buy them all shiny and new
I thought about it once, putting them on ice
I look back now and wish I’d thought twice
My friends all say that I should be happy
No more inconvenience or wearing a surfboard nappy
But I am not happy not happy at all
For reality has hit me like a brick wall
I peed on a stick in the hope I was wrong
And I wished for a bambino instead of a gong
But unfortunately the stick said I was not late
It confirmed I had just reached my used by date.
So now I am sad, very sad indeed
As I mourn the loss of the monthly bleed.